Its weird to think about all thats happened and the time thats passed. The people who have come and gone from your life, The impact they've left and the things that remain. I wrote a letter  long ago after an old flame and I parted, to be honest I don't blame him, nor hold it against him, face it, Canadian boy in Australia, the accents alone would get me. Still hurt to hear as he casually told my best friend at the time..but that was then and this is now. I am much happier and content where I am then I ever was before.


Letters I'll Never Send You
Dear You,

I loved you some completely, and you betrayed me so terribly. I don't know why you did it, and I guess i'll never  know. But i've had enough distance from it now that it doesn't hurt as bad. I still think about you everyday, but you killed that part of me that loved you.

Despite your betrayal, I still think there were times you were truthful with me - In fact I refuse to believe it was all a lie. One day I asked you why you loved me and you told me a bunch of reasons. I still think about that, and I don't think they were all lies. In some odd twisted way, despite your betrayal, I don't feel worthless and I don't question if someone will love me again. You made me see why I am lovable, and showed me how much I was capable of giving, I'm thankful for that. Your betrayal can't kill that part of my soul. I will eventually give my whole self to  a man I think is worthy. You showed me the kind of blissful happiness that can exist in trusting someone so completely.

Despite what happened, I won't let it make me so closed off and cynical. I refuse to turn into the people who drive me crazy, who stop believing in love and are incapable of it. One day, I know i'll find someone who can handle me as adaptively as you did, who will understand and love me for who I am, and not betray me as you did.

I would have given you my everything, you were the soundtrack of my summer. People say I'm a fool for having loved you, I say you're the fool for letting me go. I know now to not let a man have that much power over me. I can't say I regret you, it was just hard to get out of bed for months afterward. But I got through it, I'm here today and one day i'll take the leap with someone else.

Sincerly,
Me

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